Weekly Weather February 5, 2007
Shame seems to be the theme of the week ahead. Shame is ruled by Saturn so, as you might expect, Saturn has aspects in the week ahead. So let’s talk about shame. According to my dictionary, shame is a painful emotion caused by a strong sense of guilt, embarrassment, unworthiness or disgrace. Shame is caused by a person or thing that brings dishonor, disgrace or condemnation. Shameless, on the other hand, is impudent and implies a lack of both modesty and sense of decency together with contempt for the rights of others. A book title I’ve always loved is “Healing the Shame that Binds You.” Saturn and Shame hang out together. And, if Shame is misplaced, misused or misdirected, it does indeed bind us. Our Saturn can bind us.
I often wonder why the heavens are set up that way. As I understand it, our Saturn represents our work in our world during this incarnation. And our Saturn is the area of life we are ashamed of. The shame we feel about our Saturn has to do with how OTHER people react to our natural, normal and instinctual inclinations when we were young. We incorporated their judgments and comments about our Saturn’s behavior into our psyche and react. Often we reacted with shame.
I have Moon in Pisces trine to my Saturn in Scorpio. Saturn in Scorpio has trouble with endings. As the trine to Moon suggests, I have trouble with endings of food. When I was about 11 or so, I remember the mother a friend of mine commenting on my behavior after I ran my finger around in the marvelously delicious sauce on the snack plate and neatly licked it clean off my finger. She said, “And then she licked the platter clean!” in what I interpreted as a mocking voice. I was mortified! Shamed! Embarrassed! It was delicious sauce. I didn’t want it to end! I wanted every bit, bite and morsel of it. And, in an UNCONCIOUS moment, I acted on my instincts ~ my Moon trine Saturn in water~ to lick that platter clean of fluid. Now, I had a mother who was VERY into table manners and proper behavior. I knew better than to swipe my finger around on a plate and lick it clean, much less at someone else’s table.
Since then, whenever I want to “lick the platter clean”, I flash back to her comment and pause. It is over 40 years later! I still remember her remark as well as my reaction! Now, maybe, it was a mocking remark on her part. Or, maybe, she was pleased that I loved her sauce so much that I licked it off my plate and she “shared her joy” with my finger’s behavior by commenting on it. Or, maybe, she was trying to teach me table manners. Or, maybe, it was just a moment in time. I am willing to bet she has NO memory of it. She noticed, and commented on, my Saturn in action! And I was shamed. And I still remember it.
Shame is going to happen to you in the week ahead. Some one is going to poke at your Shame button. And when they do, I want you to say right back to who ever says some thing that shames you, “Yep, I DID lick that platter clean. IT was DELICIOUS. Can I have the recipe?” Or whatever you feel you need to say to put the shame you feel into a context that is workable, moveable and acceptable to your being.
Think about trying to be SHAMELESS about your Saturn in the week ahead. Don’t worry. You won’t go to hell or burn or be forced to carry the burden of an out of control Saturn forever. I am not going to start licking the platters on the table next to mine in New York City restaurants. But I CAN lick my OWN platter, IF I decide I WANT to lick my platter! You have an overdeveloped sense of your Saturn’s shame compared to all the other folks in your world. Part of getting to know your Saturn and healing the shame that binds you, is to let your Saturn be proud of its instincts and desires. Let Saturn lick the platter if he wants to. Or at least, own the fact that you WANT to lick the platter whether your Saturn does or doesn’t choose to lick.
Licking platters is an easy example. The harder story will be the issue that surfaces regarding your area of shame and your Saturn. Give your Saturn room to move, flex and stretch. Give your Saturn other interpretations to think about and try on. Offer your Saturn options. Or let your Saturn feel his shame. Let Saturn sit for one minute per year of life in the time out chair of shame. Then have a chat with your Saturn to let it know that you love it once the shame time out is over. You love Saturn even IF Saturn is feeling shamed and bad about his behavior. Let Saturn figure out how to work with his natural instincts and not be ashamed of them. That is how we heal the shame that binds us.
The balance of the week has aspects that ask us to embrace who we are and what we desire, regardless of what we are ashamed of. To every thing, there is a season. Venus has lovely aspects. Venus loves being in Pisces and she dances all week with Jupiter, Chiron, Pluto, Ceres, Pallas, Juno and Uranus as well as joining with the North Node. The season of Venus is to understand what you desire. What do you desire (to lick the platter of the person at the next table?) even IF you don’t act on it?
I remember being at a restaurant with a small portion friend as the waiter took her plate away. As he turned away, he popped a large shrimp left on her plate into his mouth. Just at that second, she interrupted our conversation to say, “Oh, wait, can I have those leftovers wrapped?” As he had pivoted toward me and I’d seen him eat the shrimp, it presented me with one of those “ah ha” moments about shame, desire and opportunity. During the week ahead, when Venus calls to you, act on your desires or at least acknowledge the desire. Then, in the moments after Venus calls you, if shame arises, due to no fault of your own, (other than acting on your desires), note it too. It is going to be one of those kind of weeks.
Monday, Venus expresses her desires to Pluto as symbolized by the moment that waiter pops the shrimp from your friend’s plate into his mouth ~ just as Venus speaks, Chiron rears his head. She asks for her leftovers to be wrapped. The waiter hears her as he moves away with her plate. You know the story before you. The moment of choice is upon you. What are you going to do?
Tuesday, ponder. Libra moon with no aspects lets you weigh all the various options before you. Explore the shame. Wait to see what happens. This is one of those pivotal moment in time. Just sit in the space before you and explore your various options.
Wednesday, Shame arrives in the form of Saturn in declination aspect to the Sun as Venus joins with Uranus. The Sun joins with Neptune by declination. Would you tell your friend that the waiter just ate her shrimp? Will you let him handle it~ however he choose to? Will you shout out “Oh my God, he just ate your leftover shrimp!” in a very loud voice? WHAT are you going to do? What is the waiter going to do? What is your friend going to do? Talk to your shame, nicely, as it shows up today. You will have the equivalent of popping a shrimp into your mouth as you follow a desire that leads to shame. Recognize other people are going to be super sensitive to their shame stuff. Mars has a lovely aspect to Saturn that will help you (and them) understand that link between desire, acting on desire or instinct and the shame that some times can accompany following or ignoring Saturn.
Thursday, take advantage of Sun’s union with Neptune to explore old shame memories. Venus joins with Uranus by declination. I didn’t want to rat out the waiter because of my early experience with licking the platter and my friend‘s mother‘s comment. But I watched, transfixed and fascinated, by the situation before me. Next, I rationalized ~ well, my friend almost always throws away her leftovers, uneaten. She, the Queen of the Small Portions and Food Control, could, and often did, throw away half of a Twinkie’s Ho-Ho, u
neaten, after it sat on her
desk for the entire afternoon, with the white cream filling drying out. She’d drop the desiccated Twinkie in the trash basket right before she left for the day. Me, I am a unit eater, small unit, large unit, I finish the unit. So what to do? What would you do? Talk to the Shame issue before you and figure out your choices, good, bad and ugly. No right or wrong here. You have time to do something, say something, but it is before you ~ a choice. Explore your options. Should the waiter say, “Oops, I ate your left over shrimp? Do you still want the rest?” He was QUITE furtive about popping that shrimp, rapidly, right into his mouth. Or perhaps he can quickly dump the plate into the bucket of dirty dishes, removing the conflict on his side. And, that shrimp over pasta was certainly delicious! I’d had the same entrée and finished every last bite~ including licking up my garlicky sauce with a slice of bread as I’ve progressed past finger licking in adulthood. J So look at the relationship between Venus and Saturn ~ your desire and your shame today. Try to integrate them. Support those before you who are working out their issues between desire and restriction. Some of the restrictions are necessary and others are not. What is important to you today? In your future? Do you see how to heal that shame of yours?
Friday, The Moment of Truth Arrives as Venus joins with Ceres and aspects Pallas and Jupiter. What do you think I should have done? What do you think you should do about the Shame and Desire issue before you? Vesta joins with Sagittarius asking us to understand what our belief systems are. They come from our family of origin and our tribe. I don’t begrudge the homeless fellow on my block his right to dig through the trash for leftover partial lunches from the hospital folks who eat in the park by my house. Sometimes I make sure to leave half of my sandwich on the top rim of the can so he can find it. Other times I give him a bit of money to buy his own food or alcohol. I don’t want to ruin the waiter’s tip, or my friend’s dinner or embarrass the waiter (maybe he really is a starving actor) or gross out my friend (in addition to being a small portion eater she’s got a heck of a lot of Virgo in her chart) or cause a scene and yet…. What is the right thing to do? You will be facing the same kinds of question today. Understand your Saturn. Make friends with your shame. Get to know your desire. See how they interact. Mercury’s union by declination with Uranus says “Ah and now what are you going to do ~ Is it? Is it time to say something. And, perhaps more importantly, what do you want to say? ”
Saturday arrives with Venus joining the North Node. Sun opposes Saturn. The waiter delivers the wrapped remnants of my friend’s dinner back to the table in a lovely bag as well as the check we’d asked for. I want you to just sit with the choices before you today. Look at them. Look at the shame issues. Look at the Saturn issues. Look at the Venus issues. You don’t have to do anything but look at them and understand them, where they come from, what they are and how they influence you. What are they? Can you name them? Do you see how they influence you?
Sunday, my friend pushes her leftover bag towards me, saying, “I thought your cats might like my leftover shrimp for their dinner.” Who knows, maybe she thought I might like her leftover shrimp too? By now, wiping the sauce off my similar plate of food began to assume gigantic proportions and bring up my old finger licking shame issues! Isn’t Saturn a fun planet to work with? Take advantage of the Sagittarius Moon and her aspects to Mercury and Uranus to figure out other options if my friend hadn’t passed me her leftover shrimp. The whole point of Saturn retrograde is to re-order, re-organize and re-structure what you would do based on what you know NOW.
Unfortunately, with these aspects, your friend WILL NOT push her shrimp toward you, offering it to your cats. And, the waiter WILL NOT choose to pretend to not hear my friend ask for her leftovers and dump them into the dirty dish bin. He brings them back, nicely wrapped. And you get to decide what you want to do with the situation. Isn‘t astrology fun? What is your belief system? Mercury stops in the sky, getting ready to station, and go retrograde, in two days. TIVO yourself back to watching the waiter put the shrimp in his mouth and revisit the story of the week that just passed.
Mundane: The week’s aspects speak to accountability in the world. We are accountable for our sins of omission as well as our sins of commission, as the nuns used to say. What we do and what we fail to do can BOTH be sins. Saturn rules sin as well as shame. Darn Saturn’s is in charge of so much fun stuff! The Scooter Libby trial, complete with who said what to whom is still perking away. Dick’s note with ’the prez’ crossed out suggesting Scooter was to be sacrificed instead of the other guy ~ Karl Rove? Hmmmm. Accountability and failure to follow the accountability rules properly will be prominent in the week ahead. Gonna be fun news as Saturn makes us accountable or gives us a cosmic time out to think about our behaviors and our choices.
Copyright © 2007 Anne C. Ortelee
