By Anne Ortellee

You just got home after a first date. The person was hot. Being a good astrologer, you found out their birthday. Unfortunately, the moon changes signs that day. Which moon sign do they have? Here’s a quick guide, based on how they ate, to figure it out:

Aries: The first restaurant you went to had a line. They didn’t want to wait so you left. They ordered meat, spicy or rare. After consuming their meal in 3 minutes flat, they eyed yours and asked if you were going to eat all of it. If you gave them some, they were really happy. They left a cheap tip.

Taurus: They asked the waiter to repeat the specials and savored each and every word. They got really quiet when the food came, except for little moans and mmms. They didn’t want to share their food with you. They asked the waiter about the ingredients in the sauce. They ate every bite and wiped the sauce up with their bread.

Gemini: They couldn’t decide between two entrees. After the food came, they decided they wanted what you ordered as your food looked better. They talked non-stop throughout the meal. Their cell phone rang 4 times during dinner. They answered it or checked the phone number before letting it go to voice mail.

Cancer: You went to a restaurant near their home. They ordered comfort food that they offered to share. If you shared food, they cut it and served it to you, actually putting it on your plate. They inquired about the waiter’s family. They mentioned a fabulous recipe that they would cook for you sometime soon.

Leo: It was the hottest restaurant in town with a two-week wait for reservations. They were greeted by name by the owner. After ordering an expensive wine, they recommended specific appetizers, salads and entrees. Several people stopped by the table to say hello. They picked up the bill and tipped generously.

Virgo: They suggested a lovely vegetarian restaurant in an out of the way place. Before dinner, they took digestive enzymes and vitamins. They ate fruit 20 minutes before the main course and wouldn’t drink water with their food. They offered you some of their food but didn’t want yours. They split the check to the penny.

Libra: The restaurant was stunning. The food was gorgeously presented. It was expensive. They ordered something white. They complained that the portion size was too big and only ate half of it. They didn’t want a doggie bag. They insisted on paying and left a big tip.

Scorpio: The restaurant was dark and cave like. You couldn’t read the menu in the dim light. They divided the shared food and sent back the wine. They fed you food on their fork. They talked about sex and food scenes in movies. Before reaching for the check, they asked about going back to your place.

Sagittarius: An ethnic restaurant with foreign waiters was the venue. They ordered spicy food and asked questions in the waiter’s language. They talked about eating camel while in Mongolia. You talked about world events, philosophy, meditation, traveling and exercise. They insisted on paying with a credit card.

Capricorn: They knew of a place with good food and decent sized portions for the money. Everyone knew them. The waiter said “Usual?” The food arrived in a specific order with the sauces on the side. They tipped exactly 15%. As you left, the cashier said, “ See you tomorrow.”

Aquarius: You picked the restaurant. They inquired what exactly was in several entrees. After ordering the vegetable dumplings, they broke them apart and picked out everything that looked like a mushroom. None of their food touched each other while on the plate. They didn’t eat enough to keep a bird alive and took the leftovers home.

Pisces: They suggested a place where you could share food and couldn’t find the restaurant. They drank lots of water. They talked with their mouth full. After the bill arrived, they said they didn’t have enough to cover it. They wanted you to leave a big tip for the waitress. After dinner they stopped at a cash machine and paid you back.

Copyright © 2006 Anne C. Ortelee